Sunday, March 10, 2013

The Walking Dead Season 3 Liveblog! Episode 13: Arrow on the Doorpost

Whoa, boy!

Wasn't last week's episode great?
Are you ready for what will likely be none of the same?

We know we are.

How're the cast and crew of The Walking Dead going to follow up on one of the better episodes in a few seasons? Who knows? We're ready to find out though.

Will tonight's episode feature just a single group again, or are we back to the ensemble cast?
How's Merle working out at the jail? How are preparations going?
How's the Governor's depth perception doing? He sure can still shoot. Is he planning to shoot again soon?
Daryl - we missed him for an entire episode. What's he been up to?

everyone loves some melissa etheridge, even after z-day.

We don't know, and you don't know, but if you hit the jump and we watch "Arrow on the Doorpost" (wtf does that mean?) then we're just to get at least a few answers. 

8:05 - wow - you really took that whole "hit the jump to find out" thing to heart, eh?
you know the show doesn't start for like, almost an hour, right?

you're that excited because of Morgan? I bet dude's not even in this episode. He's a busy man, y'know? He doesn't give a fuck.

seriously. The Governor wishes he was this chill.

8:20 - here's to hoping that the previous episode heavily featuring Rick and Michonne doesn't rule them out of this episode (who's kidding here? we've seen the promos) because we're quite enjoying the establishment of their friendship - that shit's important. It's already helping Rick along.

source: user kdoggt on tumblr

8:35 - by the by, word on the web is that some of you out there are hopping on the Rick and Michonne ship. This, by the by is against Intergalactic Standards of Protocol for PrettymuchaMovie Cannon, and is completely unacceptable in and about this area.

this is a no shipping zone.

8:45 - welp, make sure to load up on your drinks, 'cause this promises to be a doozy. here at the prettymuchamovie lounge we'll be sampling some maudite from unibroue, some steamwhistle, some mad tom from muskoka and some crazy canuck from great lakes brewery. we're fancy - oh, smoke 'em if you got 'em, too, it's just proper.

daryl's got a light.

8:55 - squee - 5 minutes! 

so glad we tuned in to rewatch last week!

9:00 - so, lots of stuff to remember from this season. people arming up, discussions about the gov, etc.

9:00 - we open to the sound of vehicles and an overhead shot of a cornfield with silos and junk.

Hershel and Rick are in one car, Daryl on his bike.

They run about, assessing this place, moving silently with hand signals.

Daryl's spotted walkers maybe?

Hersel is in the car with a new leg piece?

Oh, and a huge gun

9:01 - Somebody's been through recently and killed some walkers.

They continue searching on.

9:02 - Rick enters a dark building. Good move.

He cocks his gun.

This is where he meets the Gov, I guess.

He approaches a weird play setting, and the Gov walks out.

9:03 - So will they use this weird table, or no?

Gov saunters out and raises his hands, all innocent-like.


"We have a lot to talk about," the Governor says.

well, sick theme song, then commercials.

9:06 "you attacked us. makes things pretty clear."

"I was trying to make things clear. I could have killed you all, but I didn't."

Rick raises his gun, and the Governor says he's going to disarm himself. All good will and negotiation.

9:07 - this is kind of homoerotic.
Gov, taking his belt off.

"See? No gun. Now you."

Rick choses the holster his shit

Anyway, Daryl is snooping around in the background.

Anyway, they take a seat at the table, and surprise there's a secret gun duct-taped to the gov's side.

9:08 - Daryl and Hershel discuss how suspcious this all seems and another car approaches.

Daryl draws his bow as Milton, Andrea and another dude come out.

"What the hell, why's your boy already in there?" Daryl asks.

"He's here?" Andrea asks

She bursts in.

9:09 - "what's going on here?" Andrea asks.

She wants this to end.

Rick's pissed about the heads, the raids, and what happened to Maggie.

Y'know, doing stuff and thangs to Maggie.

9:10 - Hershel says maybe he should go inside.

Milton thinks it best he not go.

"Who the hell are you," he asks Milton.

Okay, so now everybody starts getting all pissy, and it's furtherly homoerotic, but Hershel breaks it up.

9:11 - Back at the prison, they're distributing arms strategically about the prison.

Merle wants them to go attack Woodbury, not waiting around.

Michonne steps in an says he told Daryl he'd stay.

Carl says Rick's got the situation under control.

"Your dad's head may be on a pike real soon," Merle tells him.

This ain't no Game of Thrones, son.

and Rick is nowhere near as cool as ol' Neddy,

Anyway, Carl runs off and Maggie chastises Merle for it.

Glenn decides they're staying, and that's final!!

9:12 - Rick offers a treaty based on East and West of a river.

Governor starts laughing.

He's here for nothing but a surrender, and says Andrea's in no place to make any negotiations.

Governor wants Andrea to leave, and Rick agrees "I'm here to talk to him."

Rick makes sense.
Governor's being a prick.

This is totally going well.

This is really not going well, actually.

Anyway, Andrea leaves, and Rick sits down, and Governor's dude closes the door, and we go to commercial.

Man, Rick better go Han Solo on this shit, if you know what I'm sayin'.


9:17 - We're back.

"So you're the Governor?"

"It's their term, not mine."

"But still, they're your people. You're beholden to them."

So, Rick ends up talking about Merle, who the Governor throws under the bus.
None of this mess would've happened if Merle didn't take Maggie and Glenn, etc.

They go back and forth about who's a Governor and who's a Sheriff...

Oh shit, then Governor drops the baby bomb.
Andrea told him you see, about his baby, and how maybe it's Rick's former partner's.  you know, that douchebag from the last two seasons.  who also had sex with andrea.
Fuckin' Andrea.

"You failed to see the devil beside you."

"Oh, I see him alright," Rick says.  and still doesn't shoot the governor, because he is really boring again.  what if lori showed up right now and told him to do it?  i'd go along with that.

Gov smacks the table. "I brought whiskey," he exclaims.  this is a pretty weird date.

also,  rick!  don't drink the whiskey.  this isn't fucking Westeros - partaking of his bread and salt will not stop the Governor from stabbing you!

9:19 - Milton suggests the men outside discuss the issues at hand.

Turns out Milton recorded the attack on Woodbury. He does that. fancies himself a historian.


9:20 - Walkers are heard on the perimeter.

Andrea runs after with a knife.

Daryl and the Governor's handsome henchman (Martinez) play "whose dick is bigger" while Andrea takes the first kill.

jeeze guys, just bone already, you fuckin' hot dogs.

9:21 - ooh, Daryl kinda saves the one dude, and they get some smokes out of the deal.
Daryl offers one, but the dude prefers menthols.

"You army or something," Daryl asks.

"No, I just hate these things, after what they did. Wife, kids."

"That sucks," Daryl responds.



This dude goes on about how this is a joke, and none of this is going to work out.

"They'll do their little dance, and next day, they'll give their word."

"I know."  Daryl delivers the classic Han Solo line.

aww, bros.

9:22 - Milton asks how Hershel lost his leg.  He's fascinated by the amputation.

"How long after the initial bite?"


"And you didn't bleed out?"

"We have good people, they took care of me."


"Nope, we just learn by trial and error"

"Me too.

In a cute scene, Milton goes on to ask to see the leg. Hershel says no ("I'm not going to show you my leg!"), and that he should at least buy him a drink first.

9:24 - back with the "Leaders" I guess.

They discuss choice, and how they're faced with many.

"We're forced to decide what to fight for. Everything we've built in the last year. Do we want to kill everyone? Everyone back at the prison, in Woodbury? Everyone we love?"

Governor goes on to tell him about the day he lost his wife. This was all before the walkers. Car accident.

Fuck, I missed his name.

"She'd left a voicemail asking me to call her, and I didn't have a chance yet. And I sat there clenching that phone wondering, what did she want? Just to check in? To ask me to pick something up for dinner?"

"What did she want," Rick asks him.

Governor says nothing, and Rick just downs more whiskey.
Maybe drinking all this stuff from a random dude isn't a good idea?
Maybe he's rocking some poison?


Anyway, they head to commercial.

9:31 - back at the prison, Glenn's welding up a fence? Maybe? Yeah.

Inside, we look at the haul from Morgan's. Merle is gearing up.

"Hey, you're not going." Glenn tells him.

Merle's pissed and Maggie steps in.

"If you're going to live here you're going to do it under our rules. If Michonne can, why can't you?"

"'Cause of my brother, blah blah blah."

Merle goes on after Glenn.

"Nut up. This man cops a feel on your woman, blah blah."

They start fighting and it doesn't look good. Maggie and Michonne step in.

Beth stops the whole thing by firing into the air, and surprising us with her resemblance to Luna Lovegood.


Everyone stands stunned.

9:33 - Hershel excuses himself from his date to go talk to Andrea.

"How's it going in there?"

"They kicked me out."

they chatter a bit then she asks about Maggie.  it's a bit rough - she's obviously afraid to know, and one would hope cognizant of the awkwardness of asking Maggie's father for this information.  but things have gone so far that she can no longer sit with her own ignorance.

"He's a sick man," Hershel tells her.  I approve of this phrasing.

Now Andrea's crying and says she can't go back to Woodbury. What can she do? Where can she go, she wonders.

Hershel tells her she's family, and can come back. "But if you join us, it's settled."

"I know," says Andrea.  this dialogue is getting a bit repetitive.

9:34 - wide shot of the Gov and Rick.

Gov gets up and starts bemoaning his role as protector of these people.

He puts his belt back on.

"I know you got guns. That was quite the stash you brought back the other day. Now, my people may not be as battle trained as yours, but I've got more of them. And this fight will be to the last man."

He goes on to say they can end this today.

"You have something I want. One thing that makes this all alright."

Rick tells him he can't have the Prison.
And that they won't leave.

Governor doesn't want that.

"No use in you moving on, no you best stay where I can keep my one good eye on you."

Gov takes his eyepatch off in a rather nasty scene.

"I want Michonne. Turn her over and this all goes away. Is she worth it? One woman versus all those lives in your prison. Is she worth it? Is she?"

Rick seems to be considering it?
whoa, that's pretty gruesome.

What a bold-faced liar. He told Rick he needed to kill them all to prove a point to his people, what? 10 minutes ago?

so, back to that whole thing where products are explained and offered to us for money

9:41 - Merle and Michonne have a quick chat.

"These people here, they're strong, they're powerful, but they ain't killers."

"Rick is, Maggie is, Carl is. That boy killed his mother."

"Mercy killing."

"And what have you done," Michonne asks.

Merle lays down his plan. Contacting Daryl with hunting calls. They then gather up and Michonne "shoguns" the Gov.

Heh, she tells him he's on his own.

9:42 - Glenn's watching walkers.
Maggie comes out to say it's her turn to watch walkers.
Glenn says he's got it.
Maggie offers to keep him company.

They both watch weird old dead people shuffle in a field and talk.

"When we got back from Woodbury, I made it all about me, and you needed your space, and I didn't give you that."

"I didn't need my space from you," she says. "I just wanted you to see me. I'm with you. I'm always with you. You know?"

He apologizes and they hug.

Aww, Glenn tells her he loves her.

Who's going to die now?

They start making out, and Glenn's still kinda watching,

"hold up. no, no. I can't do this."

Maggie drags him back into the loading dock, throwing down the door so they can totally bang, apolcalypse style.
This is awesome, and cute, and pretty hot but super stupid.

Also, why in the hell are they removing so much clothing? It's completely unnecessary. They could bang with half that stuff on.

Anyway, away they go, all naked and porno all over the floor, switching positions and everything.
I think that's their first full sex scene.

Wait, nobody died?  I thought for sure that meant - was Lori just cursed or something?
I've got to admit, despite the obvious tittilating factor, it's nice to see a sex scene in an American tv program that serves a dramatic function (even if it's the narrative shortcut of "makeup sex").

9:45 - "I get it, you've got big plans."
Rick goes on about how Gov has plans and "thangs" how he could have a statue in the town square and everything, once he brings everything back.

"But killing Michonne, that's sort of beneath you, isn't it?"

ay, Rick.  James Bond you are not.

"You could save your son. Save your daughter. Save everyone. It's your choice."

"If I give you Michonne how do I know that you'll keep your word. That you'll stop?"

"You can have everything you want," Gov tells him. "I told you I don't care about you."

"You think about it. Two days."

wow, how evil supervillian. It'd be so much more interesting to give him to midnight or something.

9:47 - Gov leaves and everyone files out to their cars behind him.
Andrea looks at the Prison crew wistfully then gets in with the Governor.
Daryl has an awesome motorcycle.

Everyone drives away and we leave for commercials on an awesome shot of the street from overhead.
umm, so that gun the governor had taped to the table goes nowhere and nobody notices?
and umm, this whole sex in the loading dock isn't going to end well, is it?

relatedly, Maggie's on talking dead tonight?

9:53 - okay, so we're back at the prison with the tiny motorcade of Daryl and Rick and Hershel.

The Governor and his crew return to Woodbury as well, in one of these trendy pop music montages this show likes so much.

Everybody gets out of their car.

Rick tells everyone to get inside.

"I want you to set up shop around the perimeter. Keep an eye out for Michonne. You see them open fire. Kill everyone but Michonne.  Keep her alive."

Milton asks the Governor about the agreement.

The Governor says the is the best way to stop a slaughter.

"This is a slaughter," Milton says.

"Not on our side," Gov says.

He goes on to explain that they have to get rid of Rick sooner or later.

He explains to his Woodbury crew that's assembled "Rick and I set terms. We'll meet again in a two days."

"What sort of terms?" Andrea asks.

The Governor laughs.

"Hope it works out," Andrea says.

9:56 - Rick tells the group a lie.
Merle says he should have killed the Governor.

"He wants the prison. He wants us. He wants us gone. He wants us dead. Dead for what we did to Woodbury."

Rick pauses and looks about.

"We're going to war," he tells them, and walks off.

Daryl and Michonne look after approvingly. Everyone else looks around.

9:57 - Outside, Rick goes walker watching.

Hershel comes out to talk to him.

"The group's taking it as well as can be expected. Merle and Michonne think we should hit first. Carol and myself think we should take our chances on the road. But if we stay and fight, so be it."

"He gave me a choice. A way out."

"What does he want?"


"He'd kill her."

"Then kill us anyway. What if he doesn't? What if this is the answer?"

"Why didn't you tell them?" Hershel asks.

"They need to be scared."

"They are."

"Good. That's the only way they'll accept it."

"She's saved my life. Glenn's. Carl's. Maggie's...She's earned her place."

He reminds Rick that she was the one who told them Maggie and Glenn had been kidnapped.

"Are you ready to sacrifice your daughters' lives for her?"

"Why are you telling me?"

"Because, I'm hoping you can talk me out of it."

Cicadas and Walkers ring out in the background, and we go to credits, 'cause hey - who likes closure.

10:00 - hey, this one was pretty damn good(-ish).
Not really amazing, but a pretty good response to last week.
Rick is sort of sliding out of his haze and re-establishing himself as leader, but one that his more willing consult his compatriots, and that's good. Umm, Andrea continues to be super confusing, and Michonne was pretty misused in this episode, but hey - it was good, and things with the Governor and Rick interacting was pretty interesting. It wasn't knocked out of the park as I had hoped, but it pretty much fit the role of what we figured had to happen, and they're continuing to develop things (in their typically incredibly slow manner).

not bad. almost sort of prettymuchamovie, and thangs.

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